Tuesday, April 24

Imbalance

Puppy Prozac? Kitty diabetes? Pet psychiatrists who can offer therapy sessions in the comfort of your own home? Canine obesity medication that costs $3 a day (or whatever they said)(!) ...and pet "accessories" like custom birthday cakes with beef pureé between layers instead of cream cheese filling and I'm not even going to mention animal clothing, jewelry and beauty salon style treatments including coloring...did I mention the most provocative trend; pet health insurance?!

Clearly, some people should not have custody of an animal. Even the Dog Whisperer alerts the public that many owners have rendered their dog psychotic because they have failed to recognize and nurture their 'dogness'. Dogs need to sniff and lick inappropriate places to be balanced. They require regular opportunities to roll in something putrid and smelly; preferably both. A dog is not happy in a wedding gown or confined inside a condo with white carpet all day long.

Is your pooch fat? Take him on a walk. For pete's sake, how do people even begin to think like this? There should be some public outrage about insensitivity towards species culture, or a fine for species-confusion abuses.

It is not acceptable that some people consider their pet to be their "child". When people have a child who will never speak or be able to provide for his own needs, they do not dress him in costumes. A child is not a pet, and a cat will never carry on the family name. Why don't these child-hungry people adopt the real thing?

Don't get me wrong, many of my best spiritual experiences have revolved around a relationship with an animal. I really like them. I reject the illogical compulsion to seriously assign human-like qualities to someone who - if given his 'druthers - would always choose to act like an animal. We should celebrate this natural proclivity of "Ginger" to be true to her breed. We should be careful to separate our affection for living creatures from our intimate and larger bond with and responsibility to our own flesh and blood.

Although ~ come to think of it, I have seen many children who resembled pampered, over-indulged or exploited and miserably undisciplined pets...

I guess if two people can ride in a cab from New York to Arizona because they didn't want to insult their 2 cats by stashing them in the cargo hold of a plane, well, I suppose we're doomed to whatever consequences result from our choice of indulgences.

It would be kind of ironic if one of those cats developed an allergy to Sedona, wouldn't it? Or better yet, maybe they will hire a lawyer and submit a petition for emancipation because their input was not considered in the removal from their place of nativity...oh, yeah, this could be good. Let's wait and see.

5 comments:

two forks said...

i heard that this morning and laughed really hard when they said, "more and more people don't have children and consider their pets to be those children" of course i died laughing. apparently it's the "oprah is god/dogs are kids" world.

CaliZona said...

All hail the mighty "O"; behold, all she surveyeth surely is her domain and her ebony arm doth crush the nations.

Holden said...

I always find this so odd. I LOVE my stupid dogs - I even really care about the birds we have and I actually have a bird fear/phobia thing. But WHAT on earth is this dog as children nonsense about. I suspect it's just an easier way for people who have busy lives and want to have some approximation of having children but have no idea that it doesn't even come close. But they console themselves with the concept that it does. And sadly, really, pets die in such a shorter time frame - I don't get it, the whole thing is bizarre.

Bandanamom said...

It says "Holden" said because apparently he was somehow signed in on but was really just me, bandanamom...just wanted to clarify!

CaliZona said...

Silly bandanamom...I knew it wasn't Holden because of the mention of bird-phobia.

Is there going to be a course on that @ BYU?!