Monday, November 5

Porch Pest Fest

I am Ralph, the Roof Rat
I am beeautiful, I am furry.
With me tiny little paws
I can scamper in a hurry.
No need, though, for hasty habits
All I needs is more than handy-
The Tanner's place (lovely people),
is just loaded with top rate "rrrat candy".

Them citrus trees is packed
with sloppy fruit so delicious ~
you'd think those folks are never
even slight-e-ly suspicious,
That we play, we frolicks ~
We gnaw: we can't get us enough
of giant, tasty blocks
of that green or yellow stuff.

We invite our pals to try some,
we share and share alike.
We never knows what hits us,
when we feel that poison "spike"! * photos by Ray & DCT


Bandanamom said...

Yikes. You know I have a rodent thing, that kind of freaks me out.

We've had these awful little dudes around a couple of times. We can always tell when they're around because they really do scamper across the roof like crazy.

We found one floating dead in the pool a few weeks ago. That's happened once before. I haven't heard a peep on the roof since. The poison in the tree seems to work well.

An interesting side note - the guys at the hardware store have an article from the paper taped up on the wall which says that they don't really eat the fruit like a food but rather they drink it. It's a water source. Also, it can be sort of ill advised to remove all the fruit from the trees (as some people now have taken to this 'gleaning' of everything) because the fruit lures them into the trees as a water source and if you have the poison in the trees they'll eat it. No fruit, they have no incentive to go in the tree and therefore, you won't be able to kill them as easily.

Food for thought.

Jen said...

oh dear. that was funny! you one crazy lady!

CaliZona said...

You say tomatoes...I say semantics take a back seat to the HOLLOWED OUT HOLE in the grapefruit that is their signature calling-card! They may indeed by drinking but in the process they have consumed the fruit what holds the juice. The little freaks even drag their "holy" grapefruit WITH them to safe places out of reach of Ellie (the dog) like behind the partition hiding the water heater.

We have a video of him running along that water pipe while Rachel and I are screaming our heads off; so HILarious!!! If only I had some help figuring out how to post that.

We need an old ladies' blogger assistance nite with Lezlee's aforementioned treats and someone young and cute like Jen or Heidi to show us the ropes!

Cynthia said...

Loved your "ode to the roof rat". You are so poetic. I am surprised you photographed one. I know they are in everyone's yard in all of north phx, but no one ever sees them, just the evidence (or the carcasses). Lucky, lucky you.

CaliZona said...

Yes I am. The luckiest.

rachel said...

i hate the little buggers. i think we just killed the last of them. haven't seen or heard anything for a month.