Saturday, November 10

Everything is Better Nowdays

I remember my mom taking my little brothers to the barber for a haircut. That's what the intention was ~ it usually involved an exhausting struggle between man and beast that always left me admiring how someone wasn't minus an ear afterwards. I hope my mom tipped the poor barber, because he sure deserved a down-payment on a house or something. But that was then: stained white tunics, outdoor magazines, rows of long, sharp scissors and towering pump-action chairs with the elevator-booster seat and nothing to safely strap in the hapless little begger...nothing at all...Now take Jack-Jack, our grandbaby extraordinaire. This was a few months ago his mommy introduced him to his very first professional haircut. So far so good; the model is about right, the fit is a little tight, and the color ain't bad...Geeeze! This isn't bad at all! Mom and Dad were giving me vibes on the way over here like you wouldn't believe - and what's to worry about? I was made for a day like today, baby! O.K., so I hafta wear this goofy cape, so what? I kinda think it suits me. What do you think?
Wait a minute...wait - um, what's that buzzing noise? You're going to do what with that thing?
No! No! No! This isn't fun anymore - and just look at my hair!
E tu, Brutus? Mom! You don't know what you're doing! She's evil, I tell you!
So, this is good. A little fuzzy...Things are really shaping up around here. A little noisy, but tasty. Ew. And double ew.FINALLY home again! Welcome to my turf, homie. This is my stuff. Everything you see here belongs to me and I'm gonna push it real good when ever I feel like it, see? And no, I don't need pants - but thanks for noticing! Now get outta the way, will ya?
An' I don't need any cute comments about my hair, see? Got a problem w'that? Sheesh! What a day!

For the next Nobel Peace Prize I would like to nominate the genius who invented the carbarberchair and thought of combining cut hair fragments and suckers in the same breathing space. Thank you!

4 comments:

Cynthia said...

I hear about that grandbaby of yours quite a bit, but I don't see many photos of him. He is way cute! I have never heard of a race car barbershop. Cool idea. I don't think my poor son (or daughters for that matter) knew that you could get your haircut anywhere but at home. He probably had his first "professional" haircut in 8th grade. In fact, I was in charge of cutting my younger brother's hair for years when I was in high school. He probably would have enjoyed your new barber compared to what I put him through.

Bandanamom said...

I cut Holden's hair at home with a rare and occasional exception (usually when it started to go really awry after a few cuts and strange lengths began to make no sense to me and bangs became odd appendages that served no purpose any more in relation to the rest of the cut) until he was in about 5th grade and started to protest my skills (which were, I admit, tenuous at best). At that point it was off to the cheap haircut place "great clips, super cuts, etc." Then, one day in a act of stupidity I got him an appt. at Tony & Guy hair salon inside Scottsdale Fashion Square mall. This completely ruined Holden for anymore cheap haircuts and it's been salon cuts ever since, he has recently graduated to a favorite salon and a favorite 'stylist' in Scottsdale at the Aveda salon I frequent as well (often, to the tune of around $50 out of my pocket). So last time he was about to get a hair cut I reminded him that 1. your summer money is pretty much spent (in the summer I make him pay for everything) and 2. I don't really feel like paying $50 to get your haircut every 3 weeks! (he's odd and picky about his hair and insists it needs to be cut that often when it's short - which is probably why I didn't protest that much when he grew it out - cheaper for me!) so...would you please consider going back to a $12 haircut at Great Clips or maybe an $18 haircut at Altheticuts? So grumpily he did go to Great Clips. When he got home his head was hanging low, chin almost touching his chest, and I said "how'd it go?" And his answer was "I was raped". His hair looked fine to me, but he was gloomy all night about it and the unruly treatment he had received at the hands of the soviet-bloc haircut specialist. He still hasn't fully recovered and it's almost time for a new haircut.

So what is the moral of this story? Avoid salons when giving your kids haircuts! What seems like a very cute photo op for Jackson is likely going to result in $50 haircuts in his near future!!!

Cynthia said...

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!! Jackson is just the cutest kid i've EVER seen!!!.....next to me...of course...LOVE YOUR FAMILY SOO MUCH!!!! YOU ARE ALL SOO CUTE!!!!!


-melanie grace hale
p.s.rachel-you soo funny!

Cynthia said...

That racecar barber shop reminds me of that one episode of Full House, where the two twins get there hair cut at.
-melanie :)
p.s. Sadly, i used to watch that show EVERYDAY...yeah i know im a nerd.